Yes, some women do ejaculate a thick, milky, white, or gray fluid when they reach orgasm. But not all do, and some women might not realize that they do.
They are increasingly available over the counter at most pharmacies. Still a lot of people don't like the idea of taking a pill. It makes you smell like a new iPhone.
If you or your partner fall somewhere on the rapid spectrum, and penis numbing spray makes a positive difference in your relationship, that's great. The concept isn't new, and these lidocaine sprays have received a thoroughly mixed bag of reviews. The Health Benefits of Moustaches.
What is premature ejaculation?
Gilbert recommends the topical treatment to his patients before he prescribes an SSRI, and so does Mulhall. He told me about it in flowing jargon involving binary eutectic, a pKa very near the pH of lidocaine, and a two-phase meld system that drives lidocaine through the stratum corneum of the skin of the penis.
If you're envisioning a total numbness which I was -- like your unfeeling lip after a dental procedure, or Krang remotely operating a detached bodyyou'll be disappointed. The options of wiping it off after giving it time for some to absorb into your skin or, more hastily, hooding it under a condom come to mind as possible solutions. If someone lightly brushed your penis with a feather, you probably wouldn't know it.
And, largely, it worked. What relationship could smilingly endure it? It's a coldly rational approach.
You do lose fine sensory details. About one in four guys experience it regularly. Costs, side effects -- especially for people tangentially on the rapid ejaculation spectrum, it's not always easy to justify being on an SSRI. If you just use it as a novelty -- so you can endure some sort of Pompeiian love festor as an extremely awkward stocking stuffer for your teenager -- that's probably fine, too. But if another guy lasts 15 minutes, and that's not cutting it, then it's a problem and can be considered rapid.
In Subscribe. The medical community has safely used topical lidocaine in various ways for decades -- it's effectively used all the time to treat the pain of zoster -- it's not expensive, it's FDA-approved under the "genital desensitization" monographand it's easier for some than a prescription pill.
One consensus of sex therapists said 3 to 7 minutes of penis-in-vagina is "adequate," while 7 to 13 minutes is "desirable. The Atlantic Crossword. A few points of note:. Looking for a down-to-the-minute definition of rapid ejaculation is a natural impulse, but not an ideal way of looking at it. It could be likened to wearing two condoms -- or, as the proverb goes, eating a steak with a balloon on your tongue.
How long is sex supposed to last? If three minutes is adequate, then when does being a little quick on the trigger become an actual medical diagnosis? But there's also clearly a continuum, on the side beyond a minute but short of ideal -- often well within the ranges therapists might consider adequate or desirable -- where distress may be milder but still entirely relevant to confidence and relationships. It's difficult to imagine a situation in which that wouldn't result in distress, personal and otherwise.
It's a suboptimal scenario, but so is an unsatisfying sexual relationship. So doctors started prescribing SSRIs for non-depressed patients, to treat premature ejaculation. That's entirely valid.
Popular Latest. Treatments like this are widely known in the urology community, but they're not commonly discussed among people who don't have an extreme problem or clinical diagnosis -- and are far from consulting a urologist -- but could benefit from a few extra sex minutes. Gilbert personally sees it beyond that, as a first-line therapy for premature ejaculation.
Luckily, medical science is on the case. Ronald Gilbert, a urologist in Newport Beach, California, is the Chief Medical Officer of a company that makes a lidocaine spray used in situations like these. This seems like it would be a giveaway -- a numb penis tell, if you will. The International Society of Sexual Medicine defines premature ejaculation as meeting all of three criteria: finishing most of the time within one minute and having it result in personal distress.
If his partner is made wholly replete in 90 seconds, then a man who lasts 95 seconds can be fine.
But Gilbert believes that his formula, called Promescent, works. When I was going around the office showing off my numb hand, shaking other people's hands, some asked about the possibility of the numbing liquid rubbing off onto one's partner.
That may be because they don't address the psychological component of the problem which, some argue, is the only component. In any case, it is worth knowing this is out there as an option.
Mulhall says it comes down to whether the guy lasts long enough. That's where topical numbing treatments can come in. Gilbert concedes that w e do not have major clinical studies to attest to whether or how well topical sprays work, but the risk of side effects and adverse reactions is remote. In the interest of science and curiosity, I tried the lidocaine spray on one of my hands. With personal lidocaine spray, anesthetized genitals are just a "please excuse me for a moment" away.
Unrelated Story. I t does feel strange, but not at all like you're existentially detached from yourself. The numbing spray idea immediately struck me as one that makes perfect sense to scientifically-minded people but sounds absurd to everyone else. I spoke with Dr. According to him, w hen we talk casually about premature ejaculation people talk casually about premature ejaculation, right?